How to Manage a Love Affair with Problem Solving.
The key, the secret and a technique.
Western culture loves solving problems..
It loves ‘doing energy’.
It loves a success story.
It can feel like we have to be building, creating, earning, grinding.
Moving forward is the new standing still!
I really love solving problems..
I want to be a success story.
I want to build, earn, create!
But sometimes I start seeing problems to solve everywhere!
It feels like I have wheels continually turning in my mind.
Enter ruminating and dissatisfaction.
When it’s hard to just be, it’s hard to be enough.
The key..
We are content when we find no problems to solve,
but it’s not because we have solved all the problems,
it’s because we have relaxed the part of us searching for problems.
The secret..
Sometimes we want to be in ‘doing mode’ and sometimes we want to be ‘being mode’.
The secret is to master the transition.
If you are in ‘doing mode’, the mind will think it can go into ‘being mode’ just like you’re flipping a switch.
That’s problem-solving. That’s ‘doing energy’.
You want more ‘being energy’.
Naturally allowing the wheels of the mind to slow down.
A technique to try…
Something I learn’t at a talk by Professor Mark Williams at the Manchester Mindfulness Festival. (P.S. His mindfulness books are excellent.)
If the mind is busy, simply say these words to yourself or in your head:
'No action needed right now.’
And watch the wheels of the mind slow to a stop..
Just let any ‘doing energy’ evaporate…
Try it for yourself. I was surprised at how well it worked.
This is a simple entry into mindfulness.
With a mindfulness practice, you can go deeper into the moment of calm and extend it.
I have created a whole ritual around this.
Reach out to me if you want to know more.
BTW the mind also responds well to other instructions..
Self-instruction is often used in hypnotherapy to effect positive change.
Do you have a favourite quote from a song, a book or a movie you might use?
Do let me know if you find something.
For some reason, I like this dramatic lyric from Mika;
‘Don't scream, there are so many roads left…
Relax, take it easy…’
Coming soon: ‘How to Manage a Love Affair with Problem Solving: Part 2.’
Could this problem seeking be you trying to find out how you feel about something or someone?